Sunday, September 13, 2020

 What kind of fresh hell is this? The pandemic keeping us apart, no hugging, no dinners together, certainly no trips to see our children. We're supposed to be masked, 6 feet apart, check for fever, breathing, contact etc etc. But get outside, commune with nature. So we do, trails through the forest with the dog and a water bottle. Don't go any farther than a tank of gas. 

Ok. 

Now the air is so bad, we close all the windows, turn on the fans, buy out air filters. And we don't go to the forest. We can watch films about forests, we can water our house plants. We can play with the cat. 

I know I talked about this before but I admit. I'm obsessed with Outlander. I've made it through the series twice and Judith snagged me all the books from a little free library. Thank you anonymous woman (you know it's a woman)  for dropping the whole series in a little free library for Judith to find and she sent me a picture. "Isn't this the series you like?" Uh, I don't like it, I have an unhealthy relationship with the characters. Especially Jamie and I'm a lesbian. Or maybe I'm not really. I have no way of knowing anymore. And it doesn't matter what I/we call ourselves. Anyway, he's a Scottish hunk with a sexy Scottish accent. I swoon. 

So Judith lugged home all eight books. And I mean lugged. They are bricks. They are seventeen hundred pages long. They broke the bag they were in. I've made it through four, working on the fifth. 

Yes I am reading my usual stuff-Sunday NYT, The Pull of the Stars by Emma Donoghue, Caste by Isabel Wilkerson, John Lewis autobiography, etc but when I want to comfort myself, it's Outlander all the way. And these days when I wake up to the uncertain gray of smokey skies and I let the dog out and decide if it's ok to walk around the block, I need/we need all the comfort we can get. The First Noble Truth is the truth of our suffering and dissatisfaction. Yep, check, got it. We are surely suffering right along with everything that lives. As we say in our clinic when we evaluate each client for risk, sometimes there are just 'too many things' for us to safely care for this woman outside the hospital. 

Y'all, it's too many things for our little hearts and psyches to hold.



Yum


4 comments:

My life so far said...

The author writes amazing sex scenes and I think Freddie Mercury is hot as hell and he's a gay man while I'm just a straight lady. Sigh.

Stay safe.

Ms. Moon said...

I listened to the whole series on audio books. Took about a year.
Do you ever look around you and think- Jesus. This is my life now?

Betsy MacWhinney said...

Ugh. I hear you! I feel like I forgot to be thankful when we could gather in groups, and then that ended and I forgot to be thankful for walking outside and then that ended. I would like to announce how very very grateful I am for my morning coffee and evening beer!
Stay well, my friend.

Elizabeth said...

It's just all too, too much. I haven't left the house in weeks, I think. I don't remember, actually.