Wednesday, November 10, 2010

While backing out of my driveway this AM, I apparently ran my back window into the big black mirror thingy sticking out at right angles from the front of a BIG YELLOW SCHOOL BUS which I didn't see????? WTF? My whole back window collapsed in an explosion of glass and crashing. At least I didn't run over any school children. Then I would have been on the evening news with my coat over my head. I wasn't even going that fast. And I was humming away, being all smug that I would arrive at clinic on time or even a wee bit early. Nope, a trip to the body shop, a rental car (an Antelope or Cheetah or some animal). A Cougar? The seat is electric. You can push a button and it goes ((brrrrrrr)) up and down and back and forwards. I still couldn't reach the gas pedal very easily.

Then they called to tell me about the bill. I almost fainted. Actually, my mouth formed a perfect 0 and I was rendered speechless. Even now I can't tell you how much a new window is going to cost. It's between 50 and a million dollars. Closer to a million. At least I can feel good that I am employing more people to work for me.

All because I am, ahem, falling for someone, a person. A human person. And I'm in a daze. I feel happy, which is a very weird feeling for me. And my evil twin is chattering that I'm delusional and it won't last and I'm just mental. So, anyway, I back my car into busses. What next, a building? Hey, I have an idea. I'll drive into an elementary school. After the kids have gone home, of course. So. I hope this new thang doesn't lead to any more property damage.

Sheesh.

5 comments:

Radish King said...

I'm godawful sorry about yr window but falling in love is such a goodness such a happy kind of falling. Ur balanced.
love,
Rebecca

beth coyote said...

Dearest R-

Thank you. I'm twitterpated. Like acid. May all beings fall in love at some point so all the colors run together.

XXXXX Beth

Pamela said...

Buses--busses (the kissing kind)?

I kissed my husband good night on our first date and he promptly wrecked his car on the way home.

This might be the start of 23 beautiful years for you.

beth coyote said...

Dear Pamela-

See, I think there should be a warning label on love-don not operate heavy machinery while under the influence.

I also think anyone in love should be put on leave from their job because they are USELESS, for as long as it takes.

Radish King said...

Agree with you both and Pamela I love that story :)