For no reason, I'd like to talk about high tea. Because my mother was a Brit, I can make fun of the Brits. Besides their imperialistic tendencies and their irrational love of the Royals, they do tea. And high tea is perfect. My daughter once took me to the Queen Victoria (natch) tea shop for mother's day. You get your very own teapot with your very own tea made properly, loose leaves, pot heated first, etc. And you choose some fancy, you never heard of it, tea like Ceylon Moonrise or Precious Pearls Jasmine Spice. They bring a layered tray with sandwiches (crusts cut off!), cucumber and salmon with cream cheese, then little fruits all arranged and petit fours on the top.

The whole place was chintz, the walls, curtains, chair covers. I caught Eden reading a Martha Sterwart magazine while we waited to be seated. And high tea is properly eaten at 4-ish because you're gonna eat supper later, like at 8PM. That's when you dress for dinner. Imagine. And all that silverware. I have the silverware. It's in a box at the top of my shelves, tarnishing as we speak. I even have a special set used only for fish, with ivory handles (sorry elephants).

Every year I think I should give my kids this stuff so they can shlep it around with them and periodically polish it. But it's still here. What do you do with detritus from a previous age? Button hooks and darning eggs? Shoe horns and coal scuttles?

I'm going to Haiti. With Midwives for Haiti. In May. OMG.

Move Your Money

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Icqrx0OimSs

So watched the video and I went to my local neighborhood bank because I'm leaving B of A, one of the bailout giants with massive 'bonuses' for their robber barons. Ug.

Washington Federal Savings and Loan. There's one around the corner from me. You can have some popcorn because there is a popcorn maker by the front door. And a Shriner candy machine. There are a few ladies doddering behind the counter. And a rumpled guy in jeans with a messy desk who was actually a bit vague when I told him I wanted to move my business account to their nice bank. He pointed toward one of the ladies who gave me some papers to sign. She even fished around behind the counter for a manila envelope to put all of my stuff in. The rumpled guy who was, I believe, the branch manager, gave me several photocopied pages of their stockholder's report. I, uh, didn't see the relevance but I thanked him anyway.

I didn't see anyone named Billy with strings tied to his fingers but one of the ladies looked suspicious. Oh, and there wasn't a crow on her shoulder. I was a bit disappointed by that. They do have some of my money now. I hope they take good care of it. As for B of A, you can kiss my grits.

Periodically I figure out how much I could get for my car (not much) and I look longingly at new/or newer cars with FOUR seats and FOUR doors. A car with a trunk. Sigh. Whenever my family comes to town, I can't drive them anywhere. I might as well have a horse.

I have an Insight, the groovy little car Honda made that is a 'concept' car, whatever that means. They don't make them anymore. And you want to know why? Because they are enormously uncomfortable, you practically sit on the ground they are so low (and invisible to massive cars), and they have an interesting blind spot so you can scare the crap out of yourself trying to change lanes. Oh, and there is a lot of road noise so after you get to 60 mph, you can't hear your music, no matter how loud you crank it up. And NO TRUNK.

I like trunks. I can put my medical equipment in a trunk. Why anyone would steal pitocin and a stethoscope is beyond me. Some of my midwife friends have lost all their stuff stolen from their cars. Dumb, OK. but the old Insight has no truck, just a lot of batteries in the back. It's like, help yourself to my swim bag and medical equipment. Here, let me help you.

I've applied to go to Haiti. ( how's that for a change of subject?) They wanted to know my availability in 2011. I said-any time is good. I can say, 'where is the library?' in French. Probably not much help.

I'm teaching a class now. Grief and Loss. It's cheery. Lighthearted. One of the students asked if we could have some fun today so I suggested that we sing first. So we did. We sang a little song first. We also laughed a little too. Then we told stories about great sadness

Oh, I met with a guy about disability insurance. He was remarkably unhelpful. Then I mentioned long term care insurance. He casually remarked that women pay twice what men do. After I stopped gasping and sputtering, he explained that women have, uh, ovaries and uteruses (duh). Oh and boobs, all cancer prone. But, I protested, men have prostates and he replied that men just die... Ok, I see, men don't go to the doc as much, they die from prostate cancer. Oh, and women live longer therefore, a longer need for long term care insurance. Can I just say, I HATE INSURANCE COMPANIES, all kinds. Even the ones that pay me for caring for moms and babies. Grrrrrrrrrr.

She sang "Because the Night." No band. No guitar.

I'm going to see Patti Smith. Tonight. Right now. I'm leaving right now. I'll let you know about it later. OMG.