Just home from a daytime birth, lovely with the great-grandma, grandma, two sisters and their kids there.

Pretty pretty babies this family makes. So nice to have a normal birth in the daytime, no less. 

I'm home and eating leftover pho with added veggies. And I think I'll have a lie down even tho I didn't lose sleep. Flew to southern California over the weekend for this:

Damn, it was hot and dusty. The wedding was swell. The best part was my sis and ex-husband were there---and we had a grand time dancing and hanging out, admiring my brother who raised the bride from the time she was about 4 years old. He walked her down the aisle and what a proud man he was to be hosting her wedding. 

Annie and I roamed the wee town, went to the movies and found a massive swimming pool (50 meter length!!!) to cool off in. When you're used to 25 meters, 50 meters is an enormous distance. Loved it. We talked and talked. We made a pact not to let time and distance get in the way of communicating. Annie, I know you're reading this, ain't it so?!

Life rolls on. I am about to have a deck out the back of the house. I will step out my bedroom door into the hot tub. Yeah!!! So what if my debt is eternal. 

My new sweetheart is more and more wonderful. She came and got the Felix for a run today while I was working. He seems actually tired. And she continues to like me. She left me a note on my pillow...

All in all, a good day.

Dear hearts-my house is lime green, deep pink, sky blue and coral.

It looks like a preschool.

I don't care.

When I figure out how to transfer pictures from my phone to my new computer, I'll show you.

Today I have ferns in my antlers too.

The sun is highlighting the clouds through my bedroom window. I still give thanks I'm not living in the cave anymore.

Hugo took a trip to the vet as he has lost a hideous amount of weight. The vet gave him fluids and drew blood. He's got a 'confusing' blood panel and he could have pancreas problems or a heart issue but there is nothing to do for either. After I brought him home, he ate huge amounts of food. Actually, every time I see him, I feed him. Lola is pissed off but her figure is a bit more svelte. Anyway, a sign that Hugo was feeling better was the wee pile of entrails on the kitchen floor this morning. Sigh.

I am having a blast with my new g'friend. Yesterday we went to a quiet suburban lake so she and her friends could paddle board and I could kayak. She came over to help me load the boat and it was SO MUCH EASIER with two people. I've been so used to doing everything by myself, it's been challenging to a) ask for help and b) have help offered out of the blue. I've been running my business, managing the home front complete with a remodel which will never be done and caring for myself and assorted animals alone. Mostly, it's fine. And then I start a relationship with this new person who is offering to be part of all this and I'm flabbergasted. Really. I don't know how to act.

She brought up all my art supplies from the basement so now I can put my studio together.

She likes me. She thinks I'm great.

Wow.

Hanging at the birth center, waiting on a momma who just met us last week and here today on her due date in labor. Whew. She transferred after seeing the 'birth center' in the hospital where she was planning to deliver. Nope, too much like a hospital. She wants a nice peaceful experience away from the hospital vibe. Now her insurance might not cover us (arghh) but she's here, she's lovely and we do free care sometimes.

She's walking up and down stairs with her man and her sister. Moaning with contractions. Felix is spending another night with Randy, the best dog person in the whole world.

My house painter almost fell off the ladder last week and now she has scaffolding. Sheesh, no more episodes, ok? We were all there: her son, my contractor and I.  We grabbed the ladder and coaxed her down. She was hanging from a soffit on the second floor. She said my voice was the one she listened to because I used my birth voice on her.

Lights, radio, double locks, don't fail me now.

And blue doors please. Sky blue doors.

It's a new day at the Coyote household. There will be motion detection lights in the back yard and keyed locks. There are timers on the lights and locks on the gates in the front. Before I get an alarm system, I've done what I can.

I replaced my computer. Had to. I did leave the dog alone tonight because I'm at a birth.

I'm digging up the yard bit by bit, turning over the sod and breaking up the clay. We took out the sidewalk so getting to the front door is interesting, especially after it rains. Yes, rain, beautiful rain, lovely rain. I have one dahlia in full bloom, a gift from the previous owners. It's huge and bright red. Dahlias, the hussies of the flower world. Big and brassy and fabulous.

Hugo, my gorgeous big cat, has gotten quite skinny. He was such a killer for the summer but not recently. I fear we need a trip to the vet. Maybe he's just old. I've had him for 12-13 years and who knows how old he was when he showed up in my back yard.

Animals...

Thievery and mayhem

Dear thieves who broke into my house, hosed my dog so he'd stay back and flooded the floors with water, stole my computer, my grandmother's silver, my grandfather's gold ring, my Kindle and a few other pieces of jewelry---

You must be desperate. I've stolen in my life. I've stolen food when I was homeless and poor. I've taken things that weren't mine for the taking.

I told a lot of people about the theft and their reactions were like this:

"Bastards!"

"I'm buying an alarm system for my house."

"I'm so sorry."

"Do you have motion lights?"

"Go to the pawn shops and or Craig's list and look for your stuff."

Dear thieves-Thank you for not hurting my dog or trashing the new walls or breaking windows. Both the katz are here and accounted for. Thank you for dropping a lot of jewelry in the driveway as you fled. Nothing valuable but gifts from friends. Thank you for reminding me how important it is to back up my computer. I have an external hard drive that I used as recently as May, hooray for me. Thank you for reminding me that my business is doing well enough to pay for another computer, and for that I'm grateful. Thank you for the opportunity to talk with my neighbors and to warm them to be safe and lock up.

The second precept encourages one to "refrain from taking that which is not freely offered." Apples on the ground are freely offered? Discuss amongst yourselves. The second precept also discusses generosity as the two go hand in hand.

Im my situation, what is being offered to me? Forgiving the thieves, who are probably between the ages of 11-17, according to the police who were here. Allowing myself to feel sad that I won't be passing along stuff from my maternal line to my children. It is just stuff, after all. Continuing to be generous in all the ways that I can. Generous with my time. Generous with my resources. Generous with my love. I hope I don't sound hopelessly naive. I'll still lock my doors. I'll consider hiding my computer when I leave the house. But I still need to forgive my younger desperate self the food I stole. And the unseen young (probably) men who entered my house, riffled my underwear drawer, and made away with some objects I was hoping to give to my children.

Those young men have learned to break and enter. What else will they learn as they grow up?

IT RAINED LAST NIGHT AND IT'S SUPPOSED TO RAIN TODAY.

PRAISE BE TO ALL THE BEINGS THAT MADE THIS HAPPEN.

Our poor Eastern Washington with huge wildfires, the smoke so thick the air in Seattle has been bad; hazy, hot and red suns in the morning and red moons at night. Firefighters have lost their lives. Houses have burned up. Of course there is no mention of all the creatures who have died. And the forests-all those trees. Great suffering in all ways. Relentless hot days, day after day after day.

I am performing a wedding on Saturday. Rehearsal dinner and run-through tomorrow. The young couple moved their ceremony from Eastern WA because of the all the fires and evacuations. They say it will rain for a few days. We expect the rain. We welcome it. It's part of our collective mystique.

And I caught a cold after a birth I did on Tuesday. Guzzling all sorts of symptoms suppression and tea and tylenol-the usual stuff. As long as I can get through the service without sneezing, coughing or blowing my nose.

I went to the lake early this morning with my kleenix and cough syrup to meet Houston on her paddle board. When Felix and I got there, she was nowhere in sight. Eventually she appeared, coming silently across the lake. Lake Washington is huge, y'all. A mirage woman on the quiet lake.

Even though I feel crappy, gotta go water my wee plants in my p-patch.

Then back to bed with my hankies and movies.

No contractors for two weeks. Exterior paint and then the deck gets built. Then a break while I figure out how to re-do the kitchen cheaply. I might just tear out everything and live in stud cavities. I'm used to it. And when you have an actual house, you have to clean it. Lola has already herked up a hairball under the bed on the new floor. It's like getting a dent in your new car.

Now I can relax.

People-

I'm dating someone who is a open water distance swimmer.

Hoo boy. I swim just fine but she left me in the dust, er, in her wake. A little dot of bathing cap way ahead of me. It's ok.

She paddle boards.

She likes me.

I like her.

There's a lot more I could say but for now.

Let's see how this goes.




(a moment of silence for Beth's tattered love life)


In other news, I have officially moved into my new expanded house. I reorganized the kitchen and there is a big bare floor in there because now the table is in the dining nook. I hung up pots and pans. I shelved jars that have been sitting out for a year. (and dusted them off). The dust is terrible but I keep at it. I moved my office into the old bedroom and now the living room is HUGE. I sprinkled plants around the house. I have two new closets and have yet to figure out what to put where.

The office shuffle is always interesting. I find photos that send me back. Pics of the kids in grade school. Friends that aren't alive any more. Stacks and stacks of poetry that I wrote. My book. My chapbook. The legal case I've been asked to testify in as an expert witness. Stuff. So much that working really interferes with my art life.

Still to set up my studio. The giant canvas I stretched has been in the garage getting dented and dusty.

When I wake, the sunrise is what I see.

I got a p-patch!!!! I went and turned over the soil in my 10X10 spot, pulled weeds and cleaned out the tool shed. The site feels a bit neglected but I'll fix that! I planted cabbage, kale, parsley and leeks. The clay soil under a thin layer of compost was so hard I threw clumps I couldn't break up against the rock wall. I so love to garden. The second time I was there, some kids were hanging at the picnic tables smoking weed and talking. So weird to walk or drive around Seattle with the smell of grass everywhere. Soon it will be commonplace.

Off to  bed. Tomorrow is a p-patch day with my new flame.  I like the way she smells. I think that's a good sign. Spicy. Faint cedar-y.

Zen dog

Today I took a shower in the tiled shower in my bathroom. For the first time. I might take another shower tomorrow.

We contemplated a glass shower door that was gonna cost a bundle and wouldn't be installed for three weeks. Jim put up a temporary shower curtain and curtain rod and I said, "Well, what's wrong with this?"

Hey, we don't have to spend over a thou for a shower door, by golly!!!!! Curtain rod and shower curtain, ta-da!

I think I want a shower curtain with Elvis on it. Or Darth Vader. Or kittens with bows. My bathroom is currently too, um, perfect. No kat barf. No clumps of fur. No random animal parts.

I know. I want unicorns. Or rainbows. Or The Terminator.

The weather here is altogether too weird. I think it's the influx of Amazon people. Don't ask for a reason but I'm sure I'm right.

Dears-

I took a bath yesterday. In my bathroom. I moved a dresser into the new bedroom. I moved a giant plant into the loft. There are bits and pieces to do still.

Andrew and his dad (XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX) tiled and it's beautiful.

Meanwhile the babies role along. One of them scared me last week but all is well.

I unpacked two boxes of toiletries and I must never buy sunscreen ever again. Eight tubes? Really?

I am officially a badass

The annual Seafair thang in Seattle. Navy war ships make their way from the base in Bremerton and we were there to greet them with our scary kayaks and peace signs. The aircraft carrier was enormous. And I'm not kidding. 

The fearless crew in front of a war ship. (I'm taking the photo)

The tip of my wee kayak and our other leetle boats. The catamaran had a huge sign that said PEACE FLEET. As you see, the water was choppy and there were police and Coast Guard boats warning us away. As if we could do any damage. David and Goliath, y'all.

It dumped rain and then stopped so we could see and hear the incomparable Mavis Staples outside at the zoo. She's 76, y'all, and a short dynamic bundle. She covered a Talking Heads song (!) among other splendors. The sun went down on cue and we headed for home after shaking ourselves out to some very fine music.



And Patty Griffin too.



Now that's a concert to sit in the rain for.

I'm waiting in the Sacramento airport for my flight. Surreal to drive through the hot, flat fields of drought afflicted California at 80 MPH. My rental car had about 2000 miles on it and it was FAST.

At the lodge, there was much swimming and eating and more swimming and eating. And a game of Risk and Rummicube and Pokemon. At least one viewing of Ratatouille. The adults made mountains of food and did mountains of dishes.

Adele and I had a brainstorm and made this cheesecake with cream cheese, yogurt, eggs, pancake batter, lemon zest and sugar. And a plethora of fresh fruit.  It was gone in 3 minutes. 

So Maya asked me to bring cream cheese, eggs, fruit and yogurt. Well, in the wilds of I-5, there is NOTHING but a Costco where one can get enough cream cheese, etc for the Great Flood. I bought a 48 ounce container of cream cheese. And yogurt. And 24 eggs.  So needless to say, we had no shortage of ingredients, except for the crust and no flour. We did have pancake batter which worked just fine. And ginger snaps which we crushed up for the crust after deciding that the date, crushed nuts idea was better as candy (and the kids agreed). So voila- we made a beautiful cheesecake that we were very proud of. 

We also put together two jigsaw puzzles, the second one in record time because Brian told us we'd never finish it. Who says I'm not competitive??

It was an artistic masterpiece of, um, unicorns, dolphins, and elephant, a camel, a rooster (?), pink fish, half-naked dancing girls---well, it was breathtaking. That girl Hazel is one of 'mine' and thats her momma and her big sister. Love them.

While searching for the 'best' puzzle to bring (ie. most tacky, with the most non-sequiturs) , I was standing in the big store in front of the display of jigsaws, from 50 piece to  2000 piece thangs. It was a toss-up between the row of dogs wearing hats and ties with binoculars and cameras around their necks and the aforementioned, uh, parade of nonsense. 

A lady of a certain age sidled up to me so we could talk jigsaws. She was admiring the variety and such. Then she asked what I did with the completed puzzle. Well, I put it back in the box?? Nope, she glued the puzzle together and hung it on her wall, in fact she had so many, she had to rotate them. Oh boy. I just couldn't tell her I was looking for the worst puzzles for our annual outing. That Adele and I have bonded over a puppy puzzle that had gerbils and butterflies in it.

Oh dear. 

It has cooled down in ye olde Seattle. I'm back at work soon enough. My house, dare I say it, is  approaching fulfillment and I can almost move my bed into the light-filled bedroom. Bathroom tiling this coming weekend (ach, Seafair with attendant deafening noise). 

Those beautiful people at the top of this post are my people. beloved people. 

People-

It is so hot here. The grass is brown and crinkly. I water my poor plants daily, sometimes twice.

But.

I have finished floors and a working faucet in the bathroom. I've actually brushed my teeth and washed my face at the bathroom sink. Week after next, I'll have tile and a shower.

The katz are lying about limply. The dog and I go to the lake where we take turns swimming. He swims, I tie him up to a log and I go in, repeat. The trick is to get my core temp down enough so going home to my very hot house is bearable. Because the last owners installed windows that open sideways, I can't leave them open. Anyone can walk by, step over the sill and ta-da! Some day, I'll replace them. Is this the end times?

My blessed neighbors are allowing me to cut down the massive arbor vitae hedge that borders our property. This is so exciting. I'll have south light. The living room will lose it's gloom. As for the cave-bedroom where I've been living for the past year, I'll be moving my bed into sunlit digs soon enough. The gloom room will become a) my office where I'll never go, b) my meditation room where I will go once a day, or c) a spare bedroom which will be used occasionally and where the katz will undoubtedly sleep and get hair all over the cover.

Then there are the boxes which have been sitting around for a year, hither and thither. What's in them? Do I even care anymore?

I had a massage yesterday with a new person. She came in the room, all diminutive bits of her and she proceeded to give me the massage of my life, hoo-boy. She named off the muscles and attachments as she went, while I groaned and wept silently. My various parts were rearranged afterwards. I've been living with random aches and pains, taking the daily ibuprofen and ignoring the elbow, knee sacrum trifecta. Because I have to work. Because I can't stop just because things hurt. Because. I'll go see her again, of course. And add yoga to my routine. I have to move or else I freeze in weird shapes.

I fell into a heat swoon and took a wee nap just now. It's too frickin' hot in here so Felix and I are heading to the water.

Ah, Scotland...

My dears:

Yes, that is stain on the floors. Next week, they'll be sealed. The last week of July, the tiling in the bathroom will be finished. Some of the lights work and some of the plumbing. I'm breathless with anticipation. 

I spread a yard of compost over the front yard and today I planted delphinium, ground cover, lilies, hebes, azalea and a few plants I thought were pretty and I don't know what they're called. I bought a new shovel. 

Dinner last night looked like this:

because of this sweet man (and giant cauliflower) and his wife, my friend Joanne:

A friend here in town has been given a grave diagnosis so I'll be helping out. My sangha has gotten good at phone trees and potlucks and rides to the doctor. 

For two days after getting home, I wept at the slightest provocation. Raw, I felt raw. Not just jet-lag but raw to the touch. And gradually, my skin has grown back and I'm beginning to feel more normal. Waiting to attend a birth, probably tomorrow. 

Brevity. That's what I'm so present to. The days fly by, plants grow and bloom and wither and die back. Those bloody block houses are springing up everywhere in our town to house the influx of techies, blots in the neighborhoods of modest two bedroom bungalows, all with low profiles and outdated kitchens. My electrician who has faithfully worked on this house for the past year told me a developer bought a lot on her street and a month later, there was a completed block house, at an inflated price. No yard, no porch, just a featureless block with windows. I've attended births in those houses and in condos where the space is all vertical, three floors with a room on each floor. Surely there is a better way to house people in dense neighborhoods. 

Then there's a house like this in Scotland. Did I mention, I left my heart in Scotland and no, not because of the whisky but because of this:

And this:

Eden going for a Yorkshire pudding and declaring, "Mom, I've made a terrible mistake."

Um, hum. High tea. What else would it be?

Dears-

I staggered up the hill from the light rail with about 435 pounds of luggage because, of course, I came back with more than I left with. My filthy white dog greeted me at the door but he is lying limply on the floor because it is feckin' hot in Seattle.

Apparently, animal control visited while I was away. And I found ANOTHER complaint from a 'neighbor' about my dog running in their yard ???????????? WTF??? He wasn't even HERE.  My dog person had him for three weeks. Naturally, I'm terrified they'll come and take him away.  This is the third complaint. The first time I had dog(s) so I called them and told them I have one fenced-in dog. The second time He was on the neighbor's property (?) so I stopped walking him down the street. Does someone not like me? He does bark at people who walk by but he's behind a fence, sheesh.

Shite.

Anyway, I'm too tired to post any pictures but I will. I'm moving to Scotland  because it is gorgeous. Paris was, well, Paris and full of French people. London was the same, only full of English people. Some many beautiful places we visited. Hanging with my girls was fun too but man, I'm really tired right now and I think it's the middle of the night where I just was so I think I'll have a lie down and tell you more stories when I've sorted myself out (and sorted out the dog).

Dear neighbor who is complaining about Felix,

Come talk to me, ok? I'm sure we can work this out. He's harmless but loud. I have a sturdy fence. What the hell is your problem?

Yours,

Beth the responsible dog owner

I leave the day after tomorrow. I'm still in bed in my tee-shirt.

I went and exchanged money yesterday. There's squatty guy with a white beard sitting behind bullet-proof glass in a downtown cubby. You hand him a wad of cash and he gives you a smaller wad of pounds.

My contractor and I talked about food of the UK. It's horrifying. Haggis is something you can eat in Scotland. Offal in a sheep's bladder? Yum. And don't ask for Scotch. Ask for whisky, duh, you're IN Scotland so of course, it's Scotch whisky. And that's whisky without an 'e'. Ireland has whiskey.  No veggies, apparently. No greens, anyway. The beer or stout is warm. Expect fish and chips.

What do I do now? Make sure I have directions to all the airb&b places. Decide what clothes to wear. Look at the weather channel again for suggestions? Hot? Cold? Rain?