This one is for James who tried to kill me yesterday well he didn't actually try to kill me but it sounds good. We went to someplace beyond Steamboat Island behind Olympia and he assured me the current would be just right and we'd cruise along like a gentle spring stream hardly having to paddle our kayaks we'd just look at the coasting birds and the seals spyhopping and it would be glorious and we'd eat peanut butter sandwiches and drink heavenly water and then slide back to the park where we had put in however there was a fierce gale which didn't even ruffle the trees but bent a mighty jumble of water full of whirlpools and wavey waves and choppy chop and the wind toyed with us spinning us around so hard I thought my arms would snap off well they did snap off and I prayed to Neptune to take my sorry ass to his undersea home where I would go a'roamin' no more and my watery grave would be a bliss and a blessing rather than my dislocated shoulders and arms and blistered thumbs. Period.
Today I'm ready for further punishment. Kayaking is great fun. You should try it. I recommend wine, ibuprofen and a whole pizza after. And a bath. And a lie down for about 12 hours.