Sunday, June 22, 2008

I survived the overnight walk. Along the way we were told we were 'almost there'. I hate that. Unless I can SEE the finish line, we are not almost there, for cripes sake. We walked along a lane of luminarias with pictures and letters to dead people, all suicides. It was difficult, more difficult than what we had just done. Marti and I sat down in front of Geoff's luminaria and she took out her bag with her sister's picture on it and we hugged and cried.

There were too many dead people, too many.

I slept until 3PM today. There are blisters on my left foot. Sometimes all I want is to be left alone.

Eden is going to Amman, Jordan for 2 weeks on a shoot. She goes everywhere.


Marti said...

Rik asked me what was my most lasting memory of the walk....the first image that came to me was walking the gauntlet of the luminaries - piercing arrows through my heart and soul-over, and over, and over again. Seeing Geoffs sweet inocent face on a bag. How can a friggen white bag hold so much pain, hope, sorrow?

I am honored to have walked with you Beth, really honored. Also, I do felt like I got a lot of free therapy thanks for that. Talking, and walking, walking and talking. I need to do more of that in my life.

I'm going to Maryangela's brothers "party" (?), do you want to go with me? I really don't want to drive to Monroe, but I do -for her. let me know. 947-6161.

My calves (sp?) are sore, but that is pretty much it. I'm happy about that.

I feel like I need to do dream up a herculian task to do to make me continue to move forward, to remember Tammy, Geoff, Theresa, Jimmy, Ryan...... Not sure what it might be.

take care,

beth coyote said...

Hi honey-when is Maryangela's party? I am so busy this week before I leave for Canada.

I would like to go with you...

The therapy was mutual. Geoff is looking at me right now.

I'll call you.