I'm in the kitchen at the birth center listening to a momma in labor. She's been here all day and she's getting louder now as darkness falls over the city. Mammals have higher hormone levels at night so we birth when the predators are sleeping, or so they say. We're ancient, you know. In spite of soap and bath water and Glade plug-ins.
I've been here all day seeing clients in the prenatal clinic. Babies and moms and dads and toddlers. We've got a few babies who are struggling to gain weight, to nurse properly. Little babies don't have a lot of reserves so we stay on them til we figure out what is wrong. Low milk supply? Sucking disorder with a tight frenulum? Back when my kids were small, you shoved a boob in the baby's mouth and hoped for the best. I was so sore for a while. No instructions on proper latch or position. We know more now but still some babies need donor milk or some formula and some mothers just don't want to nurse, for a variety of reasons. Reminds me of the recent NYT article that talked about the disservice done to mothers who don't breastfeed. We make them bad or wrong. Honestly, you don't know, looking at a bottle fed baby. Perhaps the kid was adopted. Maybe the mom has to work.
Today I talked with my young colleague about buying the business from me (gulp). I need to find someone to 'value' the practice so I know what to ask for, price-wise. In the next five years, I need to stop being on call for births and 'retire' from that end of midwifery. I could still do some clinic and keep my hand in training students. But the night call is, shall we say, difficult. In five years I'll be 70, jeezus. How on earth did that happen. And I might want to spend more time with the ones I love, including my honey. She remains my honey, after almost three months!
7 comments:
Your work, it's just the best. And knowing when to hand over.
Now I am back in my mind to the days and nights of breastfeeding my premature baby, all that business with pumps and hanging my boobs into a bowl of hot water to get the milk flowing. Carrying my stash to the hospital on the back of my bicycle and watching the my milk feeding her through the nasal tube.
I don't know how you do the hours. I never could, even when I was young.
Same for me when my babies were young- give 'em the boob and hope all would be well. And mostly, it was. I love watching Jessie nurse. She does know all about latching and so forth and August is a good nurser and all is working well. But Lily has some sort of problem that does not allow for enough milk and I watched her nurse and formula feed and that worked out wonderfully well too even though she had to truly work at it.
I love hearing about your honey.
Beautiful post. Yes, I do hope you get to retire somewhat after giving and aiding so much life.
I'm glad you're setting up for retirement, if only from nights. Sounds like a good plan. I want you to have fun with your honey and energy left for a youthful seventh decade. Damn.
I love your panda photo.
My first labour was a long, long one that looked set to pop early but then went off the boil and she wasn't born til after 3.30 the following day. Seeing the sun come up and hearing people come out and about outside was SO disspiriting.
Yes, you deserve a rest, if only from the night work. I'm sure your clients want your magical hands and spirit still. It will be hard but it is time to concentrate on your honey. BTW, congratulations on your recent relationship. It sounds strong and satisfying. You make life lovely.
Dear women-I think about retirement and I have such mixed feelings. It's the work I've done my whole life. And the vitality and love and sorrow and contentment, the whole catastrophe.
It's a hard one to put down. But I might want to finish the book I started writing. And paint. And hang with my dog. And be in love...
Teaching and mentoring and so on mean you'll never really have to put it down. And your knowledge can reach out and have a wider effect than just on the families you've worked with. I'm pretty sure the work will go on!
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