My Little Golden Book of Phobias

I just made a gingerbread for my love. I put in too much baking soda and had to scoop some of it out and I added a wee bit of sugar and walnuts which weren't called for. But.

I'd do anything for her, my darling. Because she won't ask me, I can say that. She offered me her house. I offered her mine but hers is a better deal cuz it's paid for. I still owe about a hundred million dollars on mine.

She'll eat my fallen gingerbread and declare it the best she's ever tasted. I can't worry about when this will wear off. Maybe it won't though I can't imagine that. I've been depressed for so long, the snake keeps talking in my ear.

Fuck you, snake and your hissing. Fuck you.