Friday, December 31, 2010

I have a smart house. I turn off the heat at night and the furnace ignores me. It says, 'Nuh-huh, idiot, your pipes will freeze." Oh. Everything is creaking.

And then there's the cats. They are acting very mentally ill, even for them. They run around, smacking into walls and careening off the rugs, which end up bunched and askew. Then there's the stalking thing they do, arching and puffing up and behaving all menacing with each other, as if they have never seen each other before (except for the last seven years). If humans behaved this way when it was cold outside, well, the work environment would be difficult.

"Stop stalking me, I'm trying to work here!"

"Don't you puff up your fur at me, young lady!"

(during a trip to HR)

"And then she slid all the way across the room, banging into the filing cabinets and knocking all the xmas cookies to the floor. She made the crazy eyes at me and ran out of the room sideways. I think she needs professional help."

It's New Year's Eve. I bet you already knew that.


Radish King said...

I didn't know it until I accidentally went to the store this afternoon and I thought WTF? Dates and days slip and slide around when I'm not at work. It's quite lovely. I had more of your delicious cheese tonight on a fresh baguette. Thank you dear Beth. Let's get together soon.

beth coyote said...

Yes, lets. That Indian place? I thought it was Friday today...until someone wished me a happy new year, confusing me even more.

XXX Beth